Get in shape for the recession!

On Lifehacker, a strange idea - get in shape to prevent getting fired in the economic downtuwn!

Basically, companies are going to start laying off people - that's almost certain. As a result, they're going to keep the employees that they think will do a good job. Unfortunately, the idea of the 'best' employee is subconsciously driven by appearance - if you're attractive or in shape, you'll look like a better employee.

Well, you can't really do anything about your looks, though you could start dressing better.

What you can do, right now, is getting in shape, so that you look more energetic and vital. That's the running argument, anyway, from CEO Kevin Merritt

"Start exercising. We all know that discrimination is illegal for most reasons and unethical for other reasons. But if you've watched 60 Minutes, you know that's not how humans behave. With comparably qualified candidates, the attractive, fit people are usually offered the job. What are employers looking for in prospective employees? Someone who will get the job done. If you look like you are full of energy, the perception is that you will get the job done. "

Whew - I'm exhausted from writing this article. I think I'll make myself a homemade Big Mac and then lie down. My pants are getting tight, especially around the waist, and I've got jowls. Hopefully Orble doesn't fire me for being a sloth.

Remember, though, that the sloth is as evolved as we are. Their game plan is to move so slowly that predators can't really tell that they're something to eat.

That's my plan too. Slow moving, quick-typing. Floating like a butterfly, sting like a bee.